GRRRR I had so much typed and now I have to start ALL OVER!!!! That makes me soooo mad!!!

    Okay, so today I was walking with Trivia after school and Weston was walking with Samantha (they're not going out...at least not that I know of), and I told her that I was jealous because she's always talking to him at his locker (her locker is by his n they were proly friends at Salk), but even though I don't think he's going out with her I still get jealous even though he's not mine. And Trivia goes "Well, I can run up there and start talking to him and make her go away if you want me to," and I'm like "Nah, that's okay, I'll just let it go for now" ha it was so funny! She really wants to be friends with him so she can get him to ask me out and stuff..and because he skates and so does she....but she's really trying to get me to talk to him more than I do and stuff...it's funny. I JUST WANT HIM SOOOO BAD AND I KNOW IT'S PROLLY CALLED OBSESSION BECAUSE I THINK ABOUT HIM 24/7, (too bad he don't know it), BUT I LIKE HIM SOOOOO MUCH AND I WANT TO BE HIS GIRLFRIEND SO BAD BUT I KNOW SOMEDAY I'M GOING TO HAVE TO GIVE UP ON HIM EITHER BECAUSE HE'S GOING OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE OR BECAUSE I'M SICK OF WAITING FOR TIME TO TAKE IT'S COURSE AND IT'S GONNA TEAR ME APART AND MAKE ME CRY TONS...I LOVE HIM!!! I just want to know if he likes me or not...because if he does for sure then I would ask him out, but since I don't know then I'm not going to because I'm scared of rejection.....I just love him soo much....

    Yesssssss....only 3 more hours (one day) left of Drivers Ed....YAY!! I'm sooo happy about that..no more sitting for 9 hours in school and not being able to go outside...Tomorrow I'm done!! I'm proly taking my permit test on Friday too...yessss!

    Okay, I know this song is great, and there are parts that don't apply to me but most of this song does...I like it though, and it reminds me of WeStOn...

TANGLED UP IN ME by SKYE SWEETNAM
You wanna know more, more, more about me
I'm the girl who's kickin' the Coke machine
I'm the one that's honkin' at you cause I left late again

Hey, hey, hey
Can't you see I want you
By the way I push you away
Yeah, don't judge me tomorrow
By the way I'm actin' today
Mix the words up with the actions
Do it all for your reaction, yeah
Hey, hey, get tangled up in me

You wanna know more, more, more, about me
Gotta know reverse psychology
I'm the reason why you can't get to sleep
I'm the girl you never get just quite what you see

Hey, hey, hey
Can't you see I want you
By the way I push you away
Yeah, don't judge me tomorrow
By the way I'm actin' today
Mix the words up with the actions
Do it all for your reaction, yeah
Hey, hey, get tangled up in me

You think that you know me
(Tangled up in)
You think that I'm only
(Tangled up in me)
When everything I do is only to get tangled up in you

You wanna know more, more, more, about me
I'm the girl that's sweepin' you off your feet

Hey, hey, hey
Can't you see I want you
By the way I push you away
Yeah, don't judge me tomorrow
By the way I'm actin' today
Mix the words up with the actions
Do it all for your reaction, yeah
Hey, hey, get tangled up in me

    ....and here are some things that I found on a website that I really like!!!!
i Act like i donT care.
BuT DeEp DoWn Im Lyin.
CuZ EverAytYme i C u.
AlL oVeR hEr -Im dyin.

tHe paSt iS aNn0yinG .. aLwayS sh0wiN up
iN EvRyb0dyS w0rdS . evRy s0ng y0u hEaR
evry bl0ck yu waLK & y0u nEveR waNna gEt
riD of it bEcauSe at oNe point.it was where
y0u - - WaNteD - - t0 be *

sometimes you have
to get `fucked up`
just to feel sober,
*cry* to see ||clear||
and fall down a
>>hundred times<<
before you learn
to --> pick yourself up

It just makes me realize how weird life is..
the exact same moment that meant nothing to
you..meant everything to me..and now i can't
forget.. and now you can't remember.. <|3

sometimes things have to fall apart
to make you realize just how much
you  need   them   to   fall  back
     tOgether again

it`s easy  to believe someone when they
tell you e x a c t l y what you wanna hear

Every 18 minutes someone dies from a suicide

Every 43 seconds somoene attempts one

What if you love someone?
What if you thought they felt the same?
What if you asked them who they loved?
What if it wasn't your name?

Been running from these feelings for so long,
Telling my heart I didn't need you
Pretending I was better off alone
But I know that it's just a lie
So afraid to take a chance again
So afraid of what I feel inside </33
((((((I kno this is part of a song but I liked it....and it totally applies to me!!!))))))

he tOLd me `` f O r E v E r ' ' . . . weLl silly me
i thought that forever was a lot longer than this..

     I'm gonna go to bed now...tootles!! G'nite....I'm gonna go dream of Weston and what it'll be like when I'm finally his girl...maybe...

~NiCoLe~